Being born long after IQ but Emotional Intelligence (EQ) has become the current trend for self-development. One of many reasons that put EQ in the hearts of so many people is its accurate reflection of human’s social nature. High IQ can help a person think and reason quickly, but high EQ will support people connect and cooperate for sustainable development because a high EQ person is able to build effective reciprocal relationships due to his/her ability to manage own emotions and others’.
If you consider whether having relationships and whether your relationships are positive not important elements in your pursuit of career success, you don’t need to pay any attention to EQ nor its practice. In face, how many percent of your success are soly based on your efforts and how many percent are based on others’ support?
Think of a time when you failed. What were the reasons? Would it have been better if you had been alone or had had support from others?
Hope that you've found your own answer to the question "How much important EQ/Relationship is to the success of your career?". It is without a doubt that EQ plays an important role in career success. There are more and more books, materials and courses about EQ as the demand for potential unlock and ability nurturing become a norm. But appearances can be deceiving. Beware of the common misconceptions related to EQ.
IS IT POSSIBLE TO “TEST” ONE’S EQ?
Let us look at 2 examples:
Choose your answer for this statement: I avoid mentioning sensitive or negative topics.
- Totally disagree
- Somewhat disagree
- Neither disagree nor agree
- Somewhat agree
- Totally agree
You are in a heated argument with a friend. You will:
- Argue till the end because you know you are right
- Stop for a while to keep calm and continue the discussion
- Skip it and change the topic because you don’t want to argue with friends
- Listen to your friend’s opinion and try to express your reasoning to convince him/her
Obviously, your choices might easily be influenced by what you regard as the most favourable or the most socially acceptable. There are undoubtedly people who always speak their mind, but it doesn’t necessarily mean the truth. What you think to be right is not always right and such mis-match even screws up everything, especially when you do not own a high level of self awareness. Hence, even if a person asserts to have high EQ, it may very well be the opposite.
So is there a way to accurrately measure EQ? Yes, by compiling the opinions of all people around you who frequently come into contact with you and are affected by your actions and emotions, be it positive or negative. You can’t find the accurate answer for the question “Do I always consider others’ emotions and feelings?”, but they can. The bigger the “gaps” between your and their perspectives, the more alarming your situation is!
HIGHER EQ, HIGHER SUCCESS?
There are many studies showing the positive correlation between EQ and career success. However, considering EQ the key factor leading to success is one of the most detrimental misconceptions.
To have a complete picture of a person, we need to have insights of their 3 areas: IQ (or the ability of logical thinking and reasoning), EQ (or the ability of social connection and building relationship) and personality. Different people with varying level of IQ and personality will express EQ differently. You need to take into account the context, culture and other external factors to conclude whether that expression is appropriate. EQ is considered a comprehensive set of skills about social interaction and connection, hence its practiceability. It is also easier to see changes after an EQ improvement course than an IQ or personality changing programme. And you must persevere and strive for the better. EQ or relationships only help you speed up, but it doesn’t guarantee where your road leads to.
Everyone needs to acknowledge EQ’s role in success, but it is no less important to realise the fact that having EQ is not equivalent to having success, especially when we haven’t found a highly accurate way of measuring EQ. EQ is not the panacea that cures every sicknesses and turns failures into successes. EQ is only one of many tools to help you develop and unlock more doors to success. That’s it! And tools aren’t good or evil, only your intentions are. To make sure you are using the EQ tool for a good purpose, you should first learn how to best apply EQ for your development. Stay tuned for more entries about this interesting topic from TRG Talent!